Tuesday 8 October 2002 // 1137 EDT

Seeing: Mocha

Hearing: Nora Jones - Don't Know Why

Touching: Wine colored sheets

Tasting: Turkey Sausage


I'm really tired....but I'm probably happier than I've ever been.

I'm not complaining at all, I've made a lot of changes lately and all I have to do now is have the convictions and willpower to follow through with them all. I've been doing so many good things and it's all been feeling so good...yesterday I started my new diet, I told myself that my breakfasts would be simple; bagels, rolls, breads, cereals, oatmeal, fruits, you know what I mean. Lunch would be soups, salads, and sandwiches. Dinner can be essentially whatever I like, because the point of the diet isn't to make me not eat, but to make me eat evenly across the day, instead of lump amounts at one time, and while I'm at it, I may as well watch what I eat. It's good and has been so far, I'm eating well, for the most part and doing what I want to do; but there's always room for improvement.

In the meantime, I'm also going to the gym. I started yesterday and realized exactly how long it had been since I had been to the gym and worked out pretty hard, but it was really nice to actually get out there and work out against a bodybag and practice my steps and kicks and punches again; it was nice to get in there and put a set of wraps on my fists and work out all my agression against the bag, to break a good sweat and to have a good time. It was really nice, until it got crowded, but something tells me I'll get over that soon anyway.

And then aside from that I'm trying to dress more nicely for work; yesterday I wore a pair of khaki slacks I bought a while ago, and today I'm wearing a nice pair of black slacks and a blue short sleeved button down shirt. I'm really making an effort to dress more professionally and feel more professional about my work; and besides, Natalie says I'm handsome when I dress up for work....

And that leads to the next point...Natalie.
For the time being, let's say this....life changes so quickly, does it not? Things are so strange, so wierd, but so perfect at the same time, things happen for a reason, there is a such thing as destiny, but there's also such a thing as free will...it's strange, and yes you can have both...and yes you can be happy. I'm really tired right now, so don't mind me for either not making sense or not explaining enough. Just smile with me.

In other news, I'm planning on working out three nights a week, spending more time with friends and loved ones, and taking a nice good deserved vacation....I'm looking at going back to France and Spain next summer sometime if everything pans out-and I'm hoping it does...probably going to go back to Florida in the spring...but to do all of that, make daytrips and the like, I need to save up those vacation hours and keep exercising so I look good when I go. It helps when you can go to werk and then hit the gym right after work...it's really nice.

In the meantime, I need to stop staying out so late, but I do need to get back to Joes for more of their delicious pasta. I was there with Rachel last night and it was awesome to see her and eat a huge bowl of chicken alfredo ziti...it was amazing, and then stopping by campus to see Natalie after that and staying until something like 2AM, then going home and talking to her till something like 4AM, I'm pretty wiped. Too wiped to even go to the EDMC meeting tonight and watch all the fighting, but something tells me I'll be pretty bored anyway. I'd better work on that website.

I need a weekend, but it's coming soon...yeesh, I keep saying I'm going to do things over the weekends, but I never get around to it...


Probably because I'm busy doing something else...that I think you'll understand that I want to do more.